Like any important matter in the world that requires adeptness, being good in bed takes knowledge, time, practice, and education. There are several aspects of life that can be affected by sex—relationships, confidence, health and wellness, reproduction, among other things.
Knowing how to improve sexual performance through practical methods not only improves your sex life per se, it also affects your health, confidence, relationships, reproductive health, communication, and your sense of well-being. That said, let us enumerate the ways in order for you to improve those aspects by learning the best tips to improve foreplay and sex:
1) Appreciation can go a long way
When you first meet a woman, the attraction can be mutual. You can intensify that attraction by letting her hear the perfect compliment. If you have met her and you notice something that stands out in her look, compliment her with it. If you have known her for quite a long time and you knew she had a recent achievement, congratulate her. If you think her dress is nice, let her know that her dress is fine. And when matters have already progressed, compliment how good her legs look and maybe, in time, appreciate her in a more intimate way.
2) Do not expect her to do the hard work for you
Although there are women who are extremely industrious in bed, female sexuality and arousal are not the same as male sexuality. Men get turned on easily. One stimulating sight of a sexy woman and a man can get easily aroused. So if you believe that a woman is deficient in that department because she does not respond so easily, correct yourself with that notion. Women tend to be more conservative and less confident when it comes to sexual performance. And if you can get turned on in a blink of an eye, that is hardly the case for women.
As a man, you need to do your part for her to get turned on. This also goes the same way in terms of her orgasm. It takes longer for women to do so naturally than men do. So do your job and do not expect her to do the hard work. That is why men are made of muscles and harder stuff.
3) Prioritize her pleasure
Aside from the biological purpose of sex which is to reproduce, pleasure is one of the biggest motivations why human beings engage in this activity. Men experience pleasure very easily but then, there is also a significant number of people who cannot care less about their partner’s pleasure. Even if it is just a casual encounter, it is also worth pleasuring her. It is proper etiquette not to kiss and tell but unfortunately, women kiss and tell. So it might work to your benefit if you are not being stereotyped as a lame performer in bed.
Ask her what she likes and tell her when you like what she does. It makes the woman feel genuinely confident and sexy when she realizes she did something that you like.
4) Be sensitive about women’s issues with their body and self-image
When you ask women what a perfect and attractive woman should look like, they would cite names of models whose looks on billboards and television seem almost unachievable in real life. That is because those images that circulate around several forms of media including social media, shape up their standards. What an ironic world it is that we live in because women idealize other women who do not exist. The models who they believe are perfect are retouched through Photoshopped. So if you intend to improve your chances on a woman, never kid about her looks or her body image because most women are scarred by the media.
And as if that is not enough, women are stigmatized by the belief that genitals, in general, do not look appealing. All these pressure add up to women’s insecurities and may affect how they enjoy sex. As a man, you would think that is insane. But think about a day when you feel like your stomach becomes as big as a huge round ball, that would be embarrassing even for a guy. Men do not bear the responsibility of making women feel confident. But if you make her feel comfortable when you are with her by telling her what you like about her personality or her physique, she will remember it. And when you do it, while you remove her clothes, that sure will move to your benefit.
5) Work your tongue
We are not stressing that the tongue and mouth are huge muscles that require exercise like your biceps and triceps need to. But if you use it wisely during foreplay, it will help you pleasure her more. Most people directly to the main action that they forget the fun things the tongue can do to make their partners feel more stimulated. Let the motion and pressure of your tongue vary. When kissing, use your tongue when you kiss her neck and all her other private parts.
6) Ask, listen, know, and communicate
Like any business and any relationship, sex needs good and sincere communication. Some people go to the length of faking orgasms just so they could stroke their partner's ego. Hopefully, you do not get victimized by that.
The way to avoid that is to ask her genuinely what she wants. Any person has different ways in how they want to feel pleasured. She might not like the sex position that you automatically do but you assume it anyway. Ask her about her favorite position and what things she would like you to do. This will also strengthen your relationship as a couple or as sex partners. Talking about sex can also make the two of you both aroused. If you are in in a serious relationship with your partner, there can be pressure and awkwardness at first when you try to talk about sex but the moment you try to be more open with her, she will slowly feel the same way and be more open to you.
Sexual communication is the key to knowing what you and your partner want. As an added bonus, sexual communication also gives her the chance to know what you want her to do to pleasure you. If you are also in a relationship, communication can relieve you of the unspoken tension and awkwardness. Communication is the primer on making your relationship and sex life better and stronger.
7) Give her an erotic massage
A massage can be very relaxing and may make you think that it would make her sleepy but if you apply the right strokes, a massage can break the ice between you and your partner.
If, for instance, you have not had too much physical contact or sexual activity, offering her a massage would seem like a harmless way of being a nice guy. It is flirtatious and friendly but it is also indirect. For you to give her an erotic massage as a novice, apply pressure to her back and rub it towards the groin area.
When you also massage her legs, apply pressure very slowly going up to the direction of groin. This will stimulate blood circulation towards her genitals and make her feel aroused and in the mood for some action.
8) Remember the number 8
We know you hate math, it is not surprising. Almost everybody hates math but remembering the number 8 will really help you do the trick to keep your foreplay exciting. When you are going down on her in her sensitive areas, arouse her with the figure 8 pattern by using your tongue and fingers.
Vary the degrees of pressure to add the element of surprise.
9) Hot and Cold Mix
Let us fast forward to the time when you actually have sexual activity with your partner and are looking for something new. The hot and cold mix is a foreplay activity where you and your partner make use of ice and warm water. When you go down on your partner, put ice on her genitals for a few minutes. This will shock her senses and cool her down. After that, drink the warm water and go down on her with your warm mouth. The ice that has been applied will put a contrast to the warm water and stimulate blood circulation. You do this alternatively while you can. This is mostly recommended by sex experts as one of the foreplay games that spice up a couple’s sex life.
10) Use herbal hacks that make you last longer
After a long foreplay of pleasuring her, you know you want to get some action done but again, it can be lame when you do not last longer. A trick for you to last longer and not get off too early is to become aware of your sensations before you orgasm. Familiarize yourself and your sensation so you can slow down when you feel the sensations rise.
Another way for you to last longer in terms of your energy and stamina is to take Tongkat Ali, a natural testosterone booster that affects your sex drive and endurance. Even if you have the ability to control your orgasm, it would be futile if you have no energy and stamina to last longer for more action or more orgasms.
Another natural aphrodisiac herb that can help you increase that libido and help you last longer is Horny Goat Weed. Judging by its name alone, you can conclude that its etymology had something to do with sexuality. It is also known to increase stamina and libido. With the knowledge that these herbs can help you, you will be superman in bed.
11) Experiment on new positions
The man-on-top position is the most common position that men assume. Spice it up a notch by assuming the Cuban Plunge position - bringing her knees to her chest and put her legs on your shoulders. This will allow deeper penetration for her and pleasure her more. The good thing is, it will also pleasure you more.
If you always assume the man-on-top position, do the doggy style. Experts suggest that the doggy style gives the top stimulation to her G-spot. Thrust short and shallow and alternate it with deep and fast thrusts. This will give her time to breathe and please her as well.
12) Use pheromones
Pheromones are natural substances that the body produces that signal attraction to the opposite sex. When a man has adequate amounts of male pheromones, it can make him smell more masculine and more sexually attractive to a woman near him.
The same goes for women.
This is precisely why you may see someone on a photo and not feel attracted to the person but the moment you meet the person, you notice a sense of chemistry that was not there when you were just staring at a photo. This is because of the pheromones.
It is your invisible power but it varies from one person to another. You can get pheromones through certain perfumes but be wary of the brands that you choose.
13) Mirror her style
Studies show that mirroring makes you more likable to the person you are talking to. This also goes for sex. If she does something that seems too daring or too shy or too novel for you, try it at least to keep her at ease. She will feel that you are in tuned with her and will be much easier to relate to. She will even deem you as a likable person. So if she kisses your earlobes, try kissing hers. It is also a way to reciprocate.
14) Put in some mental stimulation
It is a general misconception for men that sex should be exclusively physical and that could not be more wrong.
Mental stimulation is often, if not always, the beginning of any kind of sexual stimulation.
Men get stirred by what they see and that is processed in the brain before the body mechanisms follow to give you an erection.
On a different note, women fantasize as a part of their arousal. Keep the fantasy alive by sending her a flirty text message telling her that you want her.
15) Explore clothing optional resorts with your partner or by yourself
There are two different kinds of clothing optional resorts. One is the nudist resort but is not sexually packed. And the other sort of clothing optional resort can be considered raucous vacation destinations for couples where sex is allowed in some public places. Exploring resorts like this gives you a chance to spice things up with your partner.
Clothing optional resorts are also a great way to mingle with other people if you are single and singles who usually go to clothing optional resorts are open-minded with their view towards sex.
Some swinger couples may also frequent clothing optional resorts and at night, activities tend to get friskier with activities that appeal to the senses. Some couples, whether they are monogamous or in open relationships or swingers, do suggest that going to clothing optional sex vacation resorts can strengthen your bond with your partner as it is not a usual activity that most couples go to.
The place is erotic and you get to be surrounded by people who are liberated in their sexual view.
16) Schedule it
Planning for sex is a great way to improve your sex life especially for couples who have children. You can always dwell on the sex tips and how spicy you want your romance to be but if you do not have the time to have sex, chances are those sex tips that you have on your sleeve will just go down the drain.
Plan for it. Treat your partner or your wife to a weekend getaway where you can spend time with each other.
Women have a more emotional side to them and they appreciate being appreciated. When they are happy, it gives them a break from their normal cycle where their brain is always clouded with thoughts and it gives them a leeway to feel sexually stimulated.
17) Spice things up with new things
If you feel that everything has gotten familiar with you and your partner, then try to venture into something unfamiliar. Buy her a nice piece of lingerie that will bring arousal to the next level. You can also make use of some sex toys.
If you are a newbie on sex toys, then try the milder ones at first. Ask the store attendants or make a research first. Do not force it on her if she is not comfortable. If you have known your partner for quite some time, asking her about it would also be a good idea. If you think that she can be experimental, then give it to her as a surprise.
Sex does not have to be a chore. Relationships and sex life can get boring if you neglect the things that will make it more exciting. Listen to your partner and experiment with these tips on which one can make the action more steamy. And at the end of the day, don’t take things too seriously. Have fun, breathe, and enjoy, that’s what makes sex fun when you do it for the pleasure and not as a responsibility to your partner. With these tips in foreplay, relationship, and sex, you will be unforgettable and seemingly expert in your performance in a way that will ultimately please her.